FRIGHT FEST: HALLOWEEN HORROR NIGHTS 33 TRIP REPORT

 On Friday, Sept. 20 I made the trek up to Orlando for Halloween Horror Nights. This would be a different trip, though. The reason I was attending the event this year was because a childhood friend and fellow horror hound would be going to HHN for his first time. I never miss an event if I can help it, but this being my buddy's first time made this year an absolute do-not-miss. So, how did this year fare?

ICONS

While technically, this year doesn't have any OFFICIAL Icons, Horror Nights was nice enough to roll out two brand new unofficial Icons in the form of SINIST3R and SURR3AL. These two insidious ladies are in the business of collecting our screams and haunting our nightmares. SINIST3R is in charge of the houses Monstruos: The Monsters of Latin America, Triplets of Terror, Major Sweets Candy Factory, Goblin's Feast, and Universal Monsters: Eternal Bloodlines. SURR3AL is in charge of the houses A Quiet Place, Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire, Insidious: The Further, Slaughter Sinema 2, and The Museum: Deadly Exhibit. Like Dr. Richard Oddfellow before them, SINIST3R and SURR3AL are given free reign to roam several scare zones including Duality of Fear, Torture Faire, and Demon Ladies. They are both visually striking and memorable, and are easily highlights of this year's event.

THEME

Theme isn't necessarily vital to HHN, but when the event does decide to utilize theme it can make or break the year. This year, the theme was very scatter-shot. The first ads teased lore involving some kind of gigantic creature slumbering under Universal Studios. Next, marketing teased the iconic Universal entrance arch re-designed/re-imagined as a gigantic Lovecraftian monstrosity lovingly named Otis.  Then the first merch items utilized 90's/00's skater culture/punk aesthetic in much of it's designs. Finally, they unveiled SINIST3R and SURR3AL as the unofficial Icons. It isn't hard to see that the overall theme for HHN 33 was confusion/chaos. Nothing added up or gelled together, and all the individual pieces seemed at war with each other. Coherent, HHN 33 was not. The severe mishandling of theme wasn't enough to completely sink this year's event, but it was bad enough to remain in most's memories and shade how many would perceive this year. It also doesn't help that budget cuts played a role in HHN 33 and Hollywood definitely seemed to be in charge this go-round.

SCAREZONES

DUALITY OF FEAR

As soon as you enter the gates of Halloween Horror Nights, you must choose a path: follow SINIST3R, the manifestation of visceral horror. Or follow SURR3AL,the incarnation of unearthly terror.

This zone is located at the front of the park, and utilizes the famous iconic HHN arch. SINIST3R and SURR3AL can often be found atop the arch, berating and yelling at their victims down below. The theming of the duo's minions isn't great and there are no props or sets used. Projections are beamed down from the arch to the ground below, which is really as much theming as you get here. So yeah, this scarezone is...close to being non-existent. SINIST3R and SURR3AL carry this entire zone on their backs, and even then it's not enough to save it. This is where the Chainsaw Drill Team loiter about. 

4/10

DEMON QUEENS

Get caught in an otherworldly hellscape ripped from the darkest corners of your mind. Four merciless queens loyal to SURR3AL rule, surrounded by hordes of fanatical followers

Another "meh" scarezone. This one is in the Hollywood area, and features more minions of SURR3AL. There is a bit more theming here, and more scares...but I couldn't sparse the story (Something about SURR3AL wearing down our defenses until she's able to enter our minds and torment us). We didn't spend much time here, and it didn't leave much of an impression.

4/10

ENTER THE BLUMHOUSE

Escape a terrifying gauntlet of Blumhouse characters. From sinister sadists from The Purge and Black Phone to M3GAN dancing into your nightmares, you’ve never known horror like this.

This zone was located in the San Fran area, and was also light on theming. it consisted of several small stages where Blumhouse characters from M3GAN, The Purge. The Black Phone, and other films strut and pose. There are some scares here (None from the characters on stage, mind you), but the theming is (once again) just about non-existent. 

4/10

TORTURE FAIRE

Come one, come all, to SINIST3R’s renaissance faire with the devious theme of medieval torture. Brave the gloriously gory homemade torture devices ‘til you’re put out of your misery.

A zone I wasn't looking forward to, but it ended up impressing me. Set in the NYC area, Torture Faire had plenty of theming, lots of props, and multiple stages. A Blood Eagle is even featured (for whatever reason). All the scareactors seemed to get the assignment, and there were plenty of screams to be had here. A bonus was getting to watch SINIST3R roam and survey her domain on occasion. 

8.5/10

SWAMP OF THE UNDEAD

In backwaters Louisiana, you unwittingly wander onto private property, where you’re swamped by zombies borne from the bodies of other trespassers who were killed and dumped in a nearby bog.

Set in the Central Park area, this scarezone continues the tradition of Central Park having the most beautiful scarezones at HHN. Swamp of the Undead perfectly captures the atmosphere and ambiance of the Louisana Bayou. The zombies look pretty cool, but didn't provide much scares. luckily,  the theming and details were gorgeous. Definitely a zone I would have loved to have been able to linger in.

8.5/10  

HOUSES

MONSTRUOS: THE MONSTERS OF LATIN AMERICA

¡Ten cuidado! With La Muerte as your guide, try to survive the night with three terrifying legends: Tlahuelpuchi, La Lechuza and El Silbón.

This was the first house we hit (Meaning it's also my friend's first official HHN house). It felt very much related to 2013's Urban Legends: La Llorona. The theming is gorgeous throughout as most of the house consists of small Latin-American villages and alleyways with monsters just waiting to pop out from dark corners, doorways, and windows. There was one or two animatronics that looked ripped out of Spirit Halloween (WTF?!) and I had no idea who the monsters featured in the house are or what their lore/backstories are, but overall this was a mostly solid little sleeper house.

7/10

A QUIET PLACE

Silence your screams if you want to survive the terrifying, post-apocalyptic world. Like the Abbott family, you must keep quiet as you travel from the farmhouse to the woods, to the foundry. As soon as you make a sound, monstrous creatures who can hear the slightest noise, will hunt you down and silence you for good.

This is not a sound-based house like the marketing would have you believe...that said, it's one of the best of the night. Yeah, I wasn't expecting that. The house is very accurate to the films in the Quiet Place franchise (I don't think Day One was featured, though). The facade is the toy store from the beginning of the first Quiet Place, complete with the beeping space shuttle. Next, you enter a pitch-black tunnel using binaural audio (think the tunnel from 2019's Graveyard Games) that has a Death Angel lying in wait. From there, you are hit with a wide-open room with the title card for the house. Every Death Angel in the house is either a puppet, an animatronic, or an arm slashing wildly though a door. The movements of the Death Angels were spot-on and precise, and there were many featured throughout. The environments and sets were elaborate, realistic, and felt lived-in. This was absolutely a house I had no anticipation or excitement for, and it only continues to prove that Universal is THE BEST at crafting quality haunted houses from IPs many like myself might not be as enthused with (Just look at what they did with AVP, The Thing 2011, Dracula Untold, The Exorcist: Believer, and The Wolfman 2010).

8.5/10

GHOSTBUSTERS: FROZEN EMPIRE

A bone-chilling new specter has escaped from an ancient artifact, and he’ll stop you cold. The Ghostbusters must team up to save you and the rest of the world from a second Ice Age.

So yeah, the film this house is based on wasn't great. That said, Universal has a way of making treasure out of the mediocre. How did they do here? Not bad. There's some cold rooms and rooms with snow, one of the Garrakas got all up in my business, and there's even a room paying tribute to Vigo and the Ghostbusters 2 slime. Not a bad house, but after we had a ghostbusters house in 2019, it felt a little too soon for another one.

7/10

TRIPLETS OF TERROR

You’re invited to the Barmy triplets’ birthday celebration. But their kind of party involves recreating the murders of their entire family.

This house feels like classic HHN. There weren't many scares, but it told a full story. The story here follows the Barmy triplets, who savagely slaughter their family, then go on to recreate the murder ten years later. We start out visiting the original slaughter, walk through a dark room narrated by a child hosting a podcast about the Barmy triplets, and then we walk through their next killing spree ten years later. The locations/environments are pretty cool, including the Barmy house, back alleys, fronts of houses, and more. Triplets of Terror was not the best house of the night, but it was still very memorable and impressive. 

8/10

INSIDIOUS: THE FURTHER

 Don’t get trapped in The Further as terrifying demons try to ensnare you. The Red-Faced Demon will lure you into his lair behind The Red Door, so he can possess your living body. And KeyFace will unlock your fears with his key-tipped fingers to keep your soul trapped in The Further forever.

This was the most buzzed-about house of the event. It was being highly hyped by many event-goers as the scariest house in HHN history. I....can't agree, unfortunately. The red door façade optical illusion (where the door grows larger the closer you to get to it), the red curtain/Darth Maul Demon rooms (Where the Darth maul Demons were perfectly synced), and the two mannequin rooms (where the room is filled with mannequins, hiding amongst which are several live scare actors. These rooms are classic HHN, and I always LOVE when a house decides to utilize them) were highlights. This house was definitely the scariest of the night, but I feel the first Insidious house from 2014 was better themed and scarier. Maybe I've just grown desensitized to HHN?

8/10

MAJOR SWEETS CANDY FACTORY

 You’ve been invited to chaperone a field trip to a candy factory. But this sweet tour is about to turn sour when free samples transform the kids into candy-coated killers wielding sharpened candies.

I was expecting a lot out of this house, and it didn't exactly deliver. I LOVE the idea of a candy maker who's products turn children into sugar-crazed monsters. There is some creativity on display throughout the house, and it was certainly fun getting to explore Major Sweets' warehouse. It felt like this house should have been a mix between Giggles and Gore Inc. and Leave It To Cleaver. Good news: this house is definitely better than Giggles and Gore. Bad news: It's nowhere near as classic as Cleaver. There is some humor here, and once again, it is a fun house to walk through...but it doesn't rank near the top of the night. 

7/10

UNIVERSAL MONSTERS: ETERNAL BLOODLINES

Join Saskia Van Helsing and the Bride of Frankenstein as they face off against Dracula's Daughter and her monstrous alliance.

The story here is pretty great and engaging. Saskia Van Helsing is the last of her lineage, the rest having all been killed by Dracula and other monsters. Heartbroken and enraged, Saskia sets out for vengeance, targeting Dracula's daughter. The story is easy enough to follow, and the opening scene was pretty cool (It's raining in a graveyard, Saskia is crying in front of a grave, we enter into a crypt/mausoleum). There are some cool moments in here, and I appreciate the dark ending Saskia's story gets. This house has been getting a lot of hate, but I'd place it about on the same level of Braide of Frankenstein...maybe higher. 

7/10

GOBLIN'S FEAST

 Visit a goblin village, where hordes of bloodthirsty goblins, orcs, hobgoblins and witches would love to have you for dinner.

Another attempt at a classic HHN house. I wasn't exactly looking forward to this house, but I had hopes. Sure enough, the detail work inside is very well-done, but the interiors don't feel as large or lived-in as they could. There was nothing in here that truly wowed or scared. It feels adjacent to Dueling Dragons: Choose Thy Fate or Wicked Growth, but never gets close to those insane heights.

7/10

SLAUGHTER SINEMA 2

 If you’re dying for a B-movie horror marathon, head to the Carey Drive-in. Scream through scenes from creature features, grindhouse gore, spaghetti westerns and more.

I have heard so much high praise for the first Slaughter Sinema over the years, so I was more than eager to see what I was missing out on. Turns out...not much. This house wasn't necessarily bad, it just felt like a lesser version of H.R. Bloodengutz from 2011. It's always great to have a house set in Carey, Ohio...but this house just didn't do it for me. I've heard from event-goers that the first Slaughter Sinema was better. I'm not surprised. Not a bad house, just...I've seen better versions of this kind of house.

7/10

THE MUSEUM: DEADLY EXHIBIT

You decide to visit the new folklore museum exhibit, The Rotting Stone, when an evil escapes from within, destroying everything in its path.

Now THIS was more up my alley! A local museum decides to showcase a mysterious artifact dubbed 'The Rotting Stone', which starts to slowly infect and warp the museum once it arrives on site. This house was weird, freaky, gross, and surreal. It's really interesting and cool to see how The Rotting Stone transforms the museum around it: masks and walls come to life, security guards melt and morph, and more! This was the last house we queued up for, and it was a great way to end the night!

8.5/10 

SUMMARY

There were warning signs for HHN 33 from the very start. As far as I'm concerned, HHN 33 is another HHN 22...a weak, disappointing year. I might say it's worse than HHN 22. HHN 22 had all-timer houses like Gothic and Dead End. While there aren't any bad houses this year, there are no all-timers either. I'm always happy to support my friends, and I'm glad he had an absolute blast his first year. I'll never pass up an opportunity to attend HHN, but let's hope next year is a significant improvement. 

7/10

RANKING

SCARE ZONES

1. Swamp of the Undead

2. Torture Faire

3. Demon Queens

4. Duality of Evil

5. Blumhouse

HOUSES

1. The Museum: Deadly Exhibit

2. A Quiet Place

3. Triplets of Terror

4. Insidious: The Further

5. Monstruos: The Monsters of Latin America

6. Goblin's Feast

7. Monsters: Eternal Bloodlines

8. Major Sweets Candy Factory

9. Slaughter Sinema 2

10. Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire