Saturday, August 31, 2024

FRIGHT FEST: ALIEN 3

 "This is rumor control. Here are the facts."


In Alien 3, The Sulaco (The vessel that Ripley, Newt, Hicks, and Bishop escaped on at the end of Aliens) crashes into the ocean of a planet when a rogue facehugger, that had managed to stow away on-board the vessel, wrecks havoc. Ripley, tragically, is the sole survivor of the crash. Rescued by Dr. Jonathan Clemens, Ripley discovers the planet is home to a Weyland-Yutani mining/prison facility occupied by religious zealot prisoners/workers.

Unfortunately for Ripley and the prisoners, the horrors she has fought so hard to escape or defeat have followed her. With little means to defend themselves or fight back against the looming threat, the battle is on to survive and hopefully finally end the intergalactic menace once and for all.

The Assembly Cut gets 3.5 stars. It's dark, morose, sad, tragic, and thrilling near the end. This third outing brings the Alien series back to its darker roots. The Alien franchise has always been bleak, cynical, and borderline nihilistic, so the tone found here feels fitting and appropriate for the conclusion of the franchise.

That said, This version is still not a perfect film. The biggest issues for me are the film runs at 1 hour 24 minutes and feels too long, most of the Alien VFX don't impress (same goes for most of the VFX), and there isn't much Xenomorph action. The film also tends to cut away from quite a few of the Xeno attacks (STOP IT!!!). Every time a suit is used, it's scary, effective and impressive. The puppet used for the Ox chest-burster is pretty cool too.

Alien 3: The Assembly Cut moves at a pretty slow pace. This edit re-inserts scenes fleshing out minor characters. Unfortunately, most every minor character still ends up feeling one-note and forgettable despite this version's efforts (except for Danny Webb's Robert Morse, who is really only memorable because he winds up being the sole survivor).

Charles Dance as Dr. Jonathan Clemens (a medical doctor who resides on the planet), Charles S. Dutton as Leonard Dillon (a former "murderer and rapist of women" who has found religion. He delivers some elegant speeches and almost resembles a preacher at times. Charles S. Dutton is honestly the MVP here), and Sigourney Weaver's Ellen Ripley are all fantastic and memorable. Ralph Brown as Francis Aaron (one of the lower-ranking heads of the facility) gets enough screen-time that he is one of the more memorable side-characters.

I understand why many fans don't like Alien 3. There are character decisions regarding Newt, Hicks, Bishop, and Ripley that angered many. The only part that bothered me was the desecrating of Newt's corpse (at Ripley's behest). The funeral for Hicks and Newt is honestly very touching and sad, and had me tearing up hard. It's such a strong scene, that it makes me wish it wasn't juxtaposed with the Ox chest-burster. I get why they chose to do this (Death/birth), but having it framed in this way takes away from much of the emotion of the funeral. The decision to have Ripley die off at the end was a demand made by Sigourney Weaver herself, who had grown upset after 20th Century Fox had cut scenes from Aliens that would have fleshed out Ripley's backstory. Having Ripley die was the only way she would sign on to the film.

Alien 3 was plagued by many BTS troubles. These include numerous scripts being written then tossed out. The film's original director (Vincent Ward, who essentially came up the story for the film) left the production after 20th Century Fox demanded changes be made to the story. David Fincher would end up replacing him. The film's original cinematographer (Jordan Cronenweth) shooting for two weeks before having to stop due to Parkinsons. He would be replaced with Alex Thomson. Despite all these troubles, the film (or at least the Assembly Cut) doesn’t feel all that troubled.

The Assembly Cut was born out of a desire to make a Director's Cut. When David Fincher (who had basically disowned the film) refused to assist, 20th Century Fox looked to Fincher's editing room notes to help create a final product that might resemble something closer to what Fincher had envisioned. This is how The Assembly Cut was born.

When all is said and done, despite fans decrying Alien 3 as the worst of the franchise, Alien 3: The Assembly Cut is far from a bad film. It is flawed in some ways, and it makes many bold and decisive choices… but that doesn’t make it a bad movie. While it doesn’t explore its existential ideas quite as fully as it could, Alien 3: The Assembly Cut still attempts to right some of the ills of the Theatrical Version and is mostly successful. 

Alien 3: The Assembly Cut ends the franchise on a dark, dour note. That’s appropriate considering the Alien films have never been particularly happy or hopeful. It’s been thirty-two years since Alien 3 was released, and twenty-one years since The Assembly Cut was released. I say it’s time Alien 3 have a proper re-examination. It’s aged pretty well. Alien 3 is a flawed but fitting ending for Ellen Ripley, Weyland-Yutani, and those nasty Xenomorphs.

FRIGHT FEST: ALIEN

 What a beautiful, engrossing nightmare! Not just a film about blue-collar space truckers trying to survive “the perfect organism” that can not be killed, but also a film about how large, multi-national corporations see the worker ants they employ as nothing less than “expendable”. The direction by Sir Ridley Scott is impeccable. The pacing throughout is deliberate, slow, and perfect. Alien takes great pains to flesh-out its world and does everything it can to fully immerse viewers in it. 

The production design by Michael Seymour and set decoration by Ian Whittaker are elaborate, gorgeous, and exquisite.  The sets and designs for both the Nostromo and the Derelict are cinematically perfect, beautiful, and unforgettable. The costume design by John Mollo is a quite great . The cinematography by Derek Vanlint aids in the rich, thick atmosphere produced. 

The editing by Terry Rawlings and Peter Weatherley aids the film overall (especially in pacing). The screenplay by Dan O’Bannon is simple, but hides a good deal of depth within. The special effects by Nick Allder and Brian Johnson are terrifying, effective, and unforgettable. The score by Jerry Goldsmith is downright haunting and only adds to the atmosphere and mood of the film. 

The cast is aces all around, from the secretly sinister Ash played by Ian Holm to the rugged bad-ass Parker played by Yaphet Kotto to the struggling Captain who manages to keep his cool Dallas played by Tom Skerritt to the determined take-no-shit survivor Ripley played by Sigourney Weaver. Even Helen Horton as the voice of MU-TH-UR 6000 (Mother for short) is perfect and unforgettable. 

Alien could be described as a slow-paced, atmospheric, science-fiction horror film. The Nostromo could be described as a haunted house/ship in space. Alien continues to thrill, captivate, terrify, engulf, and immerse. 25 years later, Alien remains “the perfect organism”.

5 STARS

FRIGHT FEST: BLINK TWICE

In Blink Twice, event waitress Frida (Naomi Ackie) is invited to a private island by billionaire CEO Slater King (Channing Tatum). Slater has been trying to make amends for a boundaries violation he made a few years back. He seems to be a fairly nice guy, so Frida decides to take him up on the offer. While partying with slater's rich and douche-y friends, Naomi slowly realizes she has missing time and soon realizes that all on the island might not be quite the way it seems.

It's ironic that a film about forgetting ends up being forgettable. The cast is stacked with talented actors, but every single person is given nothing to do and essentially zero character. It’s nice to see Channing Tatum play against type for a change, and he’s likely the best one here, but it’s not enough to save the film. Blink Twice has some fun with colors. There’s a good deal of yellow and a lot of reds (Red= Bad, Yellow= Good… basically).

While this wants to be a horror comedy, it’s rarely funny and never scary. It is incredibly dark and mean, though. It doesn’t have much to say that hasn’t been said in better films or in more interesting/novel/unique ways. The one kind-of new thing it brings to the table is the theme of forgetting vs forgiving. I also like that it deals with the question of if change is ever really possible. 

I commend Zöe Kravitz for trying her hand at directing and writing (with E.T. Feigenbaum credited as co-writer), but she just does not have the sauce. Nice try, though. Unfortunately, Blink Twice is dull and uninteresting. There are very few surprises here, and the opening trigger warning basically gives away the whole game before the film even starts. Forgetting is a gift, just be grateful this film isn’t one you’ll be likely to remember in T-minus a year (or less). Save your money and re-watch Promising Young Woman instead.

1.5 STARS

FRIGHT FEST: STRANGE DARLING

“I’m just trying to have a good time.”

'Strange Darling' is one of those films that works best if you walk in knowing nothing about it. Don’t read any reviews (Heck, don't even read this review! I try to avoid spoilers, but there's always the chance something in here could inevitably tip you off to any number of this flick's numerous surprises or twists). Don’t watch any trailers. Go in blind and let the film work it’s magic.

In 'Strange Darling', a one-night stand between The Lady (Willa Fitzgerald) and The Demon (Kyle Gallant) spirals wildly out of control when one is revealed to be a serial killer. A psycho-sexual battle for dominance and power ensues. Yes, this is VERY loosely based on a real serial killer. 

Kyle Gallner and Willa Fitzgerald go toe-to-toe in the acting department. Both are superb. Kyle Gallner is an experienced horror alum, having appeared in 'Red Eye', 'A Haunting in Connecticut', 'Jennifer's Body', 'A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)', 'Red State', 'The Cleanse', 'The Cleansing Hour', 'Alien Code', 'Mother, May I', '5cream', and 'The Passenger'. Gallner has quickly become a horror darling with a rapidly growing fan base. You know whenever he's involved in a project, no matter how small his role, he's going to bring the goods. 

Willa Fitzgerald is no stranger to acting, having appeared in multiple tv shows and films. She played the lead, Emma Duval, in the first two seasons of the 'Scream: The TV Series'. She also slayed as the insanely hot and insanely bad young Madeline Usher in Mike Flanagan's 'The Fall of the House of Usher' on Netflix. While watching that show, I took to calling her Queen Bitch for a reason. It was a title she easily earned.

Happily, Fitzgerald doesn't disappoint here and once again massively impresses. As for supporting players: Barbara Hershey and Ed Begley Jr. are sweet as an elderly couple, but it's Stephen Michael Quesada who is most memorable as an experienced cop. 

J.T. Mollner directs and writes. His direction is superb and the screenplay is strong. Giovanni Ribisi (best known for his acting roles in 'Ted' and 'Avatar') is in charge of cinematography. This is his first theatrical effort, and he nails it. There are plenty of lingering close-ups that allow audiences to get the full range of an actor’s emotions, as well as some great creative shots too. 

'Strange Darling' is a puzzle-box of a movie. There are some great twists and many, many, many turns. What might be most surprising is just how much fun this film is. It’s also got a great gallows sense of humor to it at times as well. Those expecting horror will likely be disappointed, as this is more of a psycho-sexual thriller than anything else. There is a good deal of blood, though. When this film wants you to see blood, it shows you blood.

'Strange Darling' is yet another welcome surprise in 2024. It’s actually some of the most fun you’ll have in a theater this year. It’s got two phenomenal lead performances, memorable cinematography, and more-than competent direction…in other words, there’s a lot to recommend and commend here. If you want to see one of the best films of 2024, then I say it’s time to get a little strange, darling.

5 STARS

Wednesday, August 28, 2024

FRIGHT FEST: HALLOWEEN HORROR NIGHTS BEST HOUSES AND SCAREZONES

What better way to start off my Fright Fest this year than by sharing my favorite Halloween Horror Nights houses, scarezones, and shows. Below you can find a listing of all the Halloween Horror Nights events I have attended. Included are my favorite houses and scare zones, the best of which will be bolded (all-timers have *** next to them). I have attended twelve Halloween Horror Nights in total, so this should be a lengthy list. if you're ready, follow me into the fog....try not to get lost.



HHN 18

HOUSES

The Hallow

Creatures

***Body Collectors: Collections of the Past

***Dead Exposure (my first house ever)


TOTAL SEEN: 5/8

TOTAL FAVORITES: 4/5

TOTAL BEST: 3/5

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 2/5


SCARE ZONES

***Streets of Blood

***The Skool House

Asylum in Wonderland

***Fractured Tales

***American Gothic


TOTAL SEEN: 6/6

TOTAL FAVORITES: 5/6

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 4/6







SHOWS

Bill and Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure



HHN 19

HOUSES

***Silver Screams

***Leave It To Cleaver

Dracula: Legacy in Blood

Frankenstein: Creation of the Damned


TOTAL SEEN: 6/8

TOTAL FAVORITES: 4/6

TOTAL BEST: 3/6

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 2/6


SCARE ZONES

***Horrorwood Die-In

Cirque Du Freak

Apocalypse: City of Cannibals

War of the Living Dead

Lights Camera Hacktion: Chainsaw Drill Team Massacre



TOTAL SEEN: 6/8

TOTAL FAVORITES: 4/6

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 1/6


HHN 20

HOUSES

Catacombs: Black Death Rising

***Havoc: Dogs of War

Horror Nights: The Hallowed Past

Hades: The Gates of Ruin

***ZombieGeddon



TOTAL SEEN: 8/8

TOTAL FAVORITES: 5/8

TOTAL BEST: 3/8

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 2/8


SCARE ZONES

***Saws N Steam

HHN: 20 Years of Fear

Zombie Gras

The Coven


TOTAL SEEN: 6/6

TOTAL FAVORITES: 4/6

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 1/6


SHOWS

Bill and Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure



HHN 21

Houses

***The Forsaken

***Winter's Night: The Haunting of Hawthorne Cemetery

***Nightingales: Blood Prey

Nevermore: The Madness of Poe

***Saws N Steam: Into the Machine

***The In-Between


TOTAL SEEN: 8/8

TOTAL FAVORITES: 6/8

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 5/8


SCARE ZONES

Acid Assault

Canyon of Dark Souls

***Nightmaze

***Grown Evil

***7


TOTAL SEEN: 6/6

TOTAL FAVORITES: 5/6

TOTAL BEST: 5/6

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 3/6


SHOWS

Bill and Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure


HHN 22

HOUSES

Gothic

***Dead End

Alice Cooper's Welcome To My Nightmare

The Walking Dead: Dead Inside


TOTAL SEEN: 7/7

TOTAL FAVORITES: 4/7

TOTAL BEST: 2/7

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 1/7


SHOWS

Bill and Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure


HHN 23

HOUSES

Urban Legends: La Llorona

***An American Werewolf in London

The Walking Dead: No Safe Haven

The Cabin in the Woods

Havoc: Derailed


TOTAL SEEN: 5/8

TOTAL FAVORITES: 5/8

TOTAL BEST: 2 /5

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 1/5

SHOWS

Bill and Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure


HHN 24

HOUSES

***Halloween

***Roanoke Cannibal Colony

AvP

Dollhouse of the Damned


TOTAL SEEN: 8/8

TOTAL FAVORITES: 4/8

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 2/8


SCARE ZONES

***The Purge: Anarchy


TOTAL SEEN: 4/4

TOTAL FAVORITES: 1/4

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 1/4


SHOWS

Bill and Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure


HHN 25

HOUSES

***Body Collectors: Recollections

***Jack Presents: 25 Years of Monsters and Mayhem

***Freddy vs. Jason

*** Insidious


TOTAL SEEN: 9/9

TOTAL FAVORITES: 4/8

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 4/8 


SCARE ZONES

***HHN: Icons

All-Nite Die-In: Double Feature

Evil's Roots


TOTAL SEEN: 5/5

TOTAL FAVORITES: 3/5

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 1/5



SHOWS

***The Carnage Returns

Bill and Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure


HHN 27

HOUSES

American Horror Story: Vol. 2

***Scarecrow: The Reaping

Hive

Dead Waters

The Fallen

The Shining


TOTAL SEEN: 9/9

TOTAL FAVORITES: 6/9

TOTAL BEST: 4/9

TOTA ALL-TIMERS: 1/9


SCARE ZONES

***Trick r' Treat

Invasion!

The Purge


TOTAL SEEN: 5/5

TOTAL FAVORITES: 3/5

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 1/5


SHOWS

Bill and Ted's Farewell Tour


HHN 29

HOUSES

***Graveyard Games

***Universal Monsters

Stranger Things

House of 1000 Corpses

Nightingales: Blood Pitt


TOTAL SEEN: 10/10

TOTAL FAVORITES: 5/10

TOTAL BEST: 3/10

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 2/10


SCARE ZONES

***Rob Zombie's Hillbilly Deluxe

Vikings Undead


TOTAL SEEN: 5/5

TOTAL FAVORITES: 2/5

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 1/5



SHOWS

Halloween Marathon of Mayhem


HHN 30

HOUSES

***Case Files: Legendary Truth

***Wicked Growth: Realm of the Pumpkin

Welcome to SCarey: Horror in the Heartland

***The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

***HHN Icons: Captured

***Puppet Theater: Captive Audience

Revenge of the Tooth Fairy


TOTAL SEEN: 10/10

TOTAL FAVORITES: 7/10

TOTAL BEST: 7/10

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 5/10



SCARE ZONES 

***Gorewood Forest


TOTAL SEEN: 4/5

TOTAL FAVORITES: 1/5

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 1/5



HHN 32

HOUSES

***Dueling Dragons: Choose Thy Fate

***The Darkest Deal

***Blood Moon: Dark Offerings

***Dr. Oddfellow's Twisted Origins

TOTAL SEEN: 10/10

TOTAL FAVORITES: 4/10

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 4/10

SCARE ZONES

***Jungle of Doom: Expedition Horror

Shipyard 32: Horrors Unhinged

Dr. Oddfellow's Collection of Horror


TOTAL SEEN: 5/5

TOTAL FAVORITES: 3/5

TOTAL BEST: 2/5

TOTAL ALL-TIMERS: 1/5




BEST YEARS

HHN 18

HHN 19

***HHN 21 (Strongest house line-up)

HHN 25

***HHN 30

HHN 32



SCARIEST HOUSE

***DEAD EXPOSURE (HHN 18)


MOST INTENSE HOUSE

***Havoc: Dogs of War (HHN 21)


 PERSONAL FAVORITE HOUSES

!!! = TOP





!!! Silver Screams (HHN 19)

!!! Leave It To Cleaver (HHN 19)

!!! Havoc: Dogs of War (HHN 20)

!!! ZombieGeddon (HHN 20)

!!! Winter's Night: the Haunting of Hawthorne Cemetery (HHN 21)

Nevermore: The Madness of Poe (HHN 21)

!!! The In-Between (HHN 21)

Saws N Steam: Into the Machine (HHN 21)

!!! The Forsaken (HHN 21)

!!! Dead End (HHN 22)

House of 1000 Corpses (HHN 29)

!!! Graveyard Games (HHN 29)

!!! Universal Monsters (HHN 29)

!!! HHN Icons : Captured (HHN 30)

!!! Wicked Growth: Realm of the Pumpkin (HHN 30)

Case Files: Legendary Truth (HHN 30)
 
!!! Puppet Theater: Captive Audience (HHN 30)

!!! SCarey: Horror in the Heartland (HHN 30)

!!! The Darkest Deal (HHN 32)

!!! Dr. Oddfellow's Twisted Origins (HHN 32)

!!! Blood Moon: Dark Offerings (HHN 32)

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (HHN 32)

!!! Dueling Dragons: Choose Thy Fate (HHN 32)






PERSONAL FAVORITE SCARE ZONES


The Skoolhouse (HHN18)

Streets of Blood (HHN 18)

American Gothic (HHN 18)

Fractured Tales (HHN 18)

Horrorwood Die-In (HHN 19)

Saws N Steam (HHN 20)

7 (HHN 21)

Grown Evil (HHN 21)

The Purge: Anarchy (HHN 24)

HHN: Icons (HHN 25)

Trick r' Treat (HHN 27)

Rob Zombie's Hillbilly Deluxe (HHN 29)

Gorewood Forest (HHN 30)

Jungle of Doom: Expedition Horror (HHN 32)






Tuesday, June 11, 2024

May Trip to Universal

 FAST AND FURIOUS: SUPERCHARGED

Got to do the full experience recently (before I only got to do the ride during HHN, this time I got to do both pre-shows and the ride). I still don’t hate it, but I definitely don’t love it (let’s say I’m lukewarm). I feel so bad for the team members stuck doing the pre-shows as they really have nothing to work off of or with. That said, they both really made the two pre-shows a lot of fun. You could tell they both really tried. I got a guy playing Pat and a girl playing Jaime. Pat said Pat is short for Party All the Time, made a joke about how he wished this was happening during HHN, called out my Jurassic Park shirt (“Wait, you actually went to that park? How did you survive?!” When I told him it was luck, he said “You heard that folks, luck”.). He moon-walked across his stage/platform, did a mean “The Rock” impression, and complained about how the characters on the screen kept ignoring him. Jaime had some great jokes about how Taj and the others on the screen went from calling us family to civilians (She basically called them liars), and commented how they were basically delivering us into the open arms of the FBI and how we were all going to federal prison. The ride itself is still not great, but feels close to a perfect encapsulation of the films: Big, stupid, dumb, toothless, few thrills, but oddly fun. I still LOVE the party busses with no liquor. In a way, I’d compare this attraction to riding a stupid, dumb, silly B movie. For myself, I’d say it’s worth one ride-thru each trip so long as the wait isn’t long.

2 STARS


THE BOURNE STUNTACULAR

FINALLY got to experience this for myself. Very cool, very thrilling, very loud and immersive. Best way to sum up my thoughts: “I would stand in line for this”.

5 STARS


RACE THROUGH NEW YORK STARRING JIMMY FALLON

I finally got to experience Race Through NYC recently, and I don’t think it gets enough love. The queue is one of the absolute best at both IOA and Universal. The ride itself is one of the smoothest simulators I’ve ever been on (I’d go so far as to call it “comfy”), and the 3-D is fantastic. I know many find Jimmy to be incredibly annoying, but I think his persona works very well for the host of the ride. I’d actually consider this to be one of my favorite attractions at the park.

5 STARS


VILLAIN-CON: MINION BLAST

Went on Villain-Con for the first time. Very underwhelming. Very little theming and little to no immersion. Plus, there’s no real way to know if you qualify to join the villains at the end (I guess maybe the leaderboard in the gift shop?). I dig the moving walkway ride platform, the blasters you wield, and the interior queue. A decent enough attraction if you’ve got nothing else to do, but not particularly memorable or exciting.

2 STARS


MEN IN BLACK: ALIEN ATTACK

I'm still upset they killed the first two pre-shows. That said, I was surprised at well this ride holds up 24 years later. When I rode, the AAs still looked cool, and worked well. It doesn't feel or look like a ride that is 24 years old now. Still easily the best family competitive shooter in Florida, easily blows all the others out of the water.

5 STARS


SKULL ISLAND: REIGN OF KONG

I rode w/o the 3D on 5/13. The last time I had ridden it prior was in 2017 when every single effect was working, so this was a disappointing experience. I don't think new guests would notice any thing is off but to those in the know...the current state of the attraction is a real let-down. First off: THEY KILLED THE WORM IN THE QUEUE???!!!! WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE TALKING ABOUT THIS???!!!! (From what I’ve heard it was just taking a nap when I passed by). I don't have any real issue with the scareactors being removed, but it was still a cool touch when it was there. The outdoor scene definitely needs to return as it adds a real sense of anticipation and kinetic movement for those waiting outside and starts the attraction off with a true WOW moment. As for the attraction itself, it still works, but the 3D is desperately needed to sell some of the neat effects throughout (I also noticed the shadow effect on top was non-functional). The bat room works fine w/o the 3-D, but the bug room and the 360 scene just aren't effective without 3-D. I guess all we can do is continue to complain as loudly as we can until Universal gives in. I didn't hate my experience with the ride, but in the current state, I don't know if I'd be eager to jump back in line any time soon (whereas before it was always a must-do. At least the kick-a$$ Witch pre-show still works and the ride jeep is still impressive as hell).

2.5 STARS


JURASSIC PARK RIVER ADVENTURE

I was more impressed than I was expecting to be with my recent ride-thru. Most of the AAs still need a good deal of TLC, but the ride was a lot of fun and very thrilling. Plus: Tiff was working perfectly and was very impressive (Missed visiting the ol' girl). It really is the full embodiment of everything JP is and should be.

4 STARS


HAGRID’S MAGICAL CREATURE MOTORBIKE ADVENTURE

I only got to do this once, but quite enjoyed my one ride-thru. I didn’t realize that Hagrid is there with you every step of the way via constant voice-over narration. There’s just something satisfying knowing that Hagrid is always there, it kind makes you feel safer despite some dangerous moments (your bike stalling out, the Devil’s Snare scene).

I love how your bikes essentially have a mind of their own and the entire ride takes place in the forbidden forest (the show scene with the Devil’s Snare is dark, atmospheric, and cool). The multiple moments of sudden acceleration were quite thrilling and fun too. 

Unfortunately, some of the animatronics were non-functional during my journey (the Hagrid AA and Fluffy were completely motionless, while the Unicorns at the very end had incredibly limited movement). Overall, a fun ride with some intense moments, but not so intense so that little ones can still ride and enjoy it. Very well themed too. That said, I don’t think I’d give it another ride until all the animatronics are fully functional again.

4 STARS


DUDLEY DO-RIGHT’S RIPSAW FALLS

This has always been one of “my” rides. Surprised that it hurt a lot more getting into and out of the logs than it used to (maybe because I was in the back row?). The beginning mist effect was non-functional (as it often is). The Nell and Snidely uphill AAs were non-functional. The Snidely boulder AA (which is a reference to the defunct Snow White’s Scary Adventures ride at WDW) was non-functional. The tied-up Nell AA was missing/removed. So, yeah… this ride needs some TLC. That said, I still left beaming from ear-to-ear. God dammit, I love you Dudley! I always have and I always will! It remains my personal favorite log flume.

3.5 STARS (Once all the issues are fixed, it will be at least 4 Stars).


VELOCICOASTER

Got to do my first Raptor hunt recently, and I gotta say this sucker blew me right out of the water. Such an intense but smooth coaster. The second acceleration point, the top-hat (the air-time zero-G moment at the top), and the flip over the IOA lagoon were insane. The rare coaster that starts out at an intense level and finds a way to maintain if not up the intensity throughout. It literally does not let up for a second until you pull into the unload station. The queue was pretty cool too, Gotta love Mr. DNA doing the locker instructions and safety spiel. All the pre-show vids were great, the AR launch tunnel was cool, and the AA Raptor you walk past is incredibly realistic. The main pre-show vid is PERFECTION (wish I had more time to stop and watch it, and I love how Owen is still going-off when you enter the launch tunnel. He’s definitely not happy about all this). The icing on the cake is this coaster (an intense roller-coaster through the Raptor paddock created because park-goers wanted more teeth) absolutely feels like something the maniacs at Jurassic World would come up with. Overall, an A+ coaster that certainly isn’t for everyone. It’s as vicious as a Raptor and it packs one hell of a bite. I can’t wait for many more rides through the Raptor paddock in the future.

5 STARS

Monday, March 4, 2024

SMALLS’ OSCARS PREDICTIONS

EDIT: UPDATED AFTER OSCARS



 BEST PRODUCTION DESIGN

——————————————-

WHO SHOULD WIN: POOR THINGS

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: OPPENHEIMER

WHO WON: POOR THINGS


BEST VISUAL EFFECTS

————————————

WHO SHOULD WIN: THE CREATOR

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: THE CREATOR

WHO WON: GODZILLA MINUS ONE


BEST SOUND DESIGN

———————————

WHO SHOULD WIN: OPPENHEIMER

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: OPPENHEIMER

WHO WON: THE ZONE OF INTEREST


BEST ORIGINAL SCORE

———————————-

WHO SHOULD WIN: OPPENHEIMER

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: OPPENHEIMER

WHO WON: OPPENHEIMER


BEST EDITING

———————

WHO SHOULD WIN: POOR THINGS

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: OPPENHEIMER

WHO WON: OPPENHEIMER


BEST ORIGINAL SONG

———————————

WHO SHOULD WIN: I’M JUST KEN

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: WHAT WAS I MADE FOR?

WHO WON: WHAT WAS I MADE FOR?


BEST MAKEUP AND HAIRSTYLING

—————————————————

WHO SHOULD WIN: POOR THINGS

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: MAESTRO

WHO WON: POOR THINGS


BEST COSTUME DESIGN

————————————-

WHO SHOULD WIN: POOR THINGS

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: OPPENHEIMER

WHO WON: POOR THINGS


BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY

————————————-

WHO SHOULD WIN: POOR THINGS

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: OPPENHEIMER

WHO WON: OPPENHEIMER


BEST FOREIGN FILM

——————————

WHO SHOULD WIN: THE ZONE OF INTEREST

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: THE ZONE OF INTEREST

WHO WON: THE ZONE OF INTEREST


BEST ANIMATED PICTURE

—————————————

WHO SHOULD WIN: SPIDER-MAN

WHO I THUNK WILL WIN: SPIDER-MAN

WHO WON: THE BOY AND THE HERON


BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY

——————————————-

WHO SHOULD WIN: THE HOLDOVERS

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: THE HOLDOVERS

WHO WON: ANATOMY OF A FALL


BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY

——————————————

WHO SHOULD WIN: OPPENHEIMER

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: OPPENHEIMER

WHO WON: AMERICAN FICTION


BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS

——————————————

WHO SHOULD WIN: DA’VINE JOY RANDOLPH

WHO I THNK WILL WIN: DA’VINE JOY RANDOLPH

WHO WON: DA'VINE JOY RANDOLPH


BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR

—————————————

WHO SHOUKD WIN: MARK RUFFALO

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: ROBERT DOWNEY JR.

WHO WON: ROBERT DOWNEY JR.


BEST ACTRESS

————————

WHO SHOULD WIN: EMMA STONE

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: EMMA STONE

WHO WON: EMMA STONE


BEST ACTOR

———————-

WHO SHOULD WIN: PAUL GIAMATTI

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: CILLIAN MURPHY

WHO WON: CILLIAN MURPHY


BEST DIRECTOR

————————-

WHO SHOULD WIN: CHRISTOPHER NOLAN

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: CHRISTOPHER NOLAN

WHO WON: CHRISTOPHER NOLAN


BEST PICTURE

———————-

WHO SHOULD WIN: OPPENHEIMER

WHO I THINK WILL WIN: OPPENHEIMER

WHO WON: OPPENHEIMER


FINAL SCORE: WHO SHOULD WIN = 10

FINAL SCORE: WHO WILL WIN = 11

FINAL SCORE: TOTAL OSCAR CATERGORIES CORRECT- 14